Ride or Die...

This is as close to a car as I want to come.

According to my crazy mother, I should enjoy car rides. And to a degree I do. I like seeing all the stuff that's outside my little neighborhood. There are so many people. There are so many trees and so many flowers. There are so many cats and squirrels. But to a larger degree, I HATE IT!

Riding in the car makes me want to scream. (And I often do scream.) Why does my mother have to listen to that stuff she calls music? I hear no whistling. It's not music to me.  How come people in other cars pretend they can't hear me when I try to talk to them? It's so rude. I'm just trying to give them a friendly hello bark. Except those nutty people walking around on the sidewalks with their hoods up. I don't trust anyone with a hood on their head. I simply have to take my anger out on them! And what's up with windows anyway? My mom only rolls it down far enough for me to get fresh air. Woman, I wanna jump out! Everything passes by too quickly. I want to walk around and take my time sniffing everything, peeing on everything. It's a man's job to mark his territory. Cars don't allow you to do that.

My silly sister loves to go on car rides. That means she's been on all sorts of cool trips with Mama and Daddy. She's been to Michigan, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Ohio, Indiana, and everywhere in between. She just lays around the house, so I guess it's no different to lay around in the car. She hangs her head out the window, but never tries to jump out. She's such a bummer sometimes. I would hate to be stuck in the car for so long. I love to run too much.

Apparently, my mom really wants me to go on car rides with her. I know this because I heard her telling my Grammy about these leashes that lock in to your seatbelts. I guess she found them at this place called Pep Boys and wanted to buy me one. Sounds like doggy torture to me.  Then I couldn't even run from the front to the back of the car and back again. She showed me a picture of my friend Bella in her car seat. I mean, that's alright. At least a short guy like me could see out the window without stretching, but still.... I WANT TO PEE ON EVERYTHING! No matter to me that my mom keeps treats, a water bowl, a bottle of water, and a bag of food in the car at all times. I have those in my house and my Grammy will give them to me if my mama won't.

I just prefer to walk I guess.

Does anyone else really freak out in the car? Or am I the only dog in the world that does this? I'm honestly curious. Please let me know.

Barks and Licks,
Teddy

P.S. Besides, she's always taking me to the vet or the groomer in the car. NOT associated with great memories after you've been neutered.